Fall Rising: Chapter 6

Sorry I couldn’t help you today, but here are some supplies. The paint and brushes are Libby’s, and I didn’t exactly ask to use them, so don’t wreck them or anything. Here are your keys, too. Morgan came back around midnight, and Pete and Jason are fine. So I don’t need the car after all. Thank you, though. And thanks for being so good to Christian. I guess I won’t use my pepper spray on you after all. - Jess

“Okay, I’m ready to go,” Jess whispered, folding the note she had written to Coby and putting it in her coat pocket.

It had been one of those sugar-induced, spur-of-the-moment ideas to try and smooth things over with Coby by sending Libby’s paints and brushes and the note home with Bryan. Jess would drive Coby’s car back, following Bryan, and then he insisted on dropping Jess off himself.

“Let me just get Christian,” Jess said, wishing she didn’t have to take him out of bed for a middle-of-the-night trip. But Legend was sleeping, and she still didn’t know Libby or Emily terribly well, and considered them a little bit young.

Morgan reached out, her head resting on the crinkled pages of the used anatomy book Emily had drenched. She found Jess’s hand and squeezed it. “I can just crawl in bed with him if you want,” she offered. “When you come back, you can just crash in my bed.”

Jess smiled. “Thanks. Watch out, though. He has amazing talent to cuddle and sprawl at the same time,” she joked.

“Oh, don’t worry, so do my brothers,” Morgan reassured.

--

Coby woke up in a foul mood. It was bad enough that he had to be up before the sun for drive-time alone, and that he had spent almost an hour on the phone with his brother, Blake, trying to convince him not to drive home when he was smashed. Coby insisted he call their dad to pick him up and Blake refused. Finally they compromised, and Blake managed to walk home, talking to Coby on the phone the entire time. By the time he’d gone to bed, it was after three.

Cringing, he realized suddenly that he didn’t have his car. Good intentions or not, it was a stupid move when he had a long drive to make and a deadline to meet. He sighed, knowing that now he’d have to call Nathaniel and ask if they could use his car, which was kind of rude, considering the guy had been the only one to readily agree to help him out, despite the ungodly hour they had to meet up.

Picking through the piles of dirty laundry on his floor, Coby quickly found what he had deemed his work jeans. They were black, worn, and streaked with all kinds of paint. The shirt was also black, with a red spider web design on the front. It made him think of Christian, who had told him last night that he slept the best in his Spiderman pajamas.

Coby pulled open his bedroom door, and nearly tripped over the little pile just outside it. He bent down, inspecting it. On top, was a note from Bryan, explaining that the stuff was from Jess, and she had asked him to drop it off.

Intrigued, Coby picked up the second note, which he knew immediately was from Jess. He smiled as he read it, noting the finger paints, brushes and car keys. He breathed a small sigh of relief, grateful that Jess seemed to realize, at last, that he wasn’t a dangerous guy.

He glanced at the clock and cursed as he saw there wasn’t even time for him to go through the fridge and grab whatever his hand first touched. He would be late as it was, and prayed Nate was on top of his game, as Coby started his car and backed quickly out of the lot.

--

Nate was falling asleep at the counter, waiting for his pumpkin spice flavored coffee to brew. He kept himself busy, picking out two large insulated mugs for himself and Coby. Next, he stopped by the kitchen table, and stared longingly at the decadent looking brownies Jonathan had received in the mail the day before. On top of the plastic wrap was a chicken-scratch note that threatened, Touch these and die. So Nate contented himself by picking out two of the best doughnuts from the box Jon had picked up from the bakery, instead of making breakfast when it was his turn.

Carefully, Nate considered the doughnuts left, and thought about which ones would taste best with his pumpkin flavored coffee. He decided on a regular glazed one, and a chocolate one, knowing he would eat either one. Quickly, he filled the mugs and balanced a doughnut on each cover. Then he made his way outside to wait.

--

Coby pulled up beside where Nate stood with cups and something else balanced on top of them. Coby hoped to God it was breakfast. Leaning over, he pushed the door open, and called a greeting, as Nate climbed in.

“Hey,” Nate grinned tiredly. “You have a doughnut preference? It’s pumpkin spice coffee.” He held out both mugs topped with their respective doughnuts.

“Coffee,” Coby sighed in near-reverence, picking the plain-glazed for himself.

Nate happily bit into the chocolate one, knowing it was as close to brownies as he would get as long as he lived with Jon. Maybe he should ask his mom to send some. Or Josiah. His little brother wanted to be a chef someday. He could even outdo their mom in the kitchen.

They drove in silence, each waiting for the caffeine to kick in. The sky changed gradually, until they were no longer driving in darkness, but the breaking dawn. “Nice morning,” Nate commented finally. His attention was caught by something in the backseat.

“Why are Libby’s paints back here?” Nate asked, reaching back to grab one of the little containers. It, like each of the others, was labeled LJW - for Libby Jane Wright, Nate knew - not Elizabeth, ever. Not unless you were her mom or someone else’s.

A smile touched Coby’s lips involuntarily. “Jess had Bryan drop them off last night as a joke. She said she was sorry for not being able to help and sent these as supplies.”

“That’s sweet,” Nate commented, seeing the crush clearly in Coby‘s eyes. “So you gonna ask her out?” He took a sip of coffee, cringing as it burned his throat.

Coby gave a sidelong and skeptical glance. “Ask out the girl who just admitted she decided not to use her pepper spray on me?” He shook his head as Nate laughed good-naturedly. “I think she needs more time. I’m taking things slow.”

“Yeah,” Nate nodded. “Probably wise.” A pause. “Do you know what happened to her?” he asked quietly, remembering the bruises that still had not gone away on either Christian or Jess.

Coby shook his head, concern and anger darkening his brown eyes to nearly black. “Liam tried to get it out of her, but she wouldn’t talk to him. Figure we might find out today though,” Coby drained the last of the coffee, thinking of the Bible study he and Nate had to make by ten. He knew Nate was skipping a morning class to help him out.

“Hey,” he said after they were parked and standing at the side of the house.

Nate glanced over, brush already in hand.

“Thanks for doing this,” Coby told him, nodding.

“No problem,” Nate responded. He shrugged a little, and then they both set to work.

--

Liam decided that, to encourage openness, they should have Bible study outside. It was a beautiful morning, after all. He picked a secluded spot surrounded by sunlight outside the Education building, where they usually met. Liam had worn a tall Dr. Seuss red-and-white striped hat, hoping to attract the attention of the other study-goers. He was also wearing blue-jean shorts, flip-flops and his favorite shirt. It was red, with white lettering like a popular soda company. It said: “Jesus Christ” in big, fancy letters and underneath: “Whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst,” like the scripture.

Eventually, he saw a group of kids coming toward him and squinted, making out a pink tank top right away. His heart skipped. God had been faithful and Morgan was back. He made himself stay where he was and not take off running in her direction, looking like a goon, especially in the crazy hat.

The tank, like all the others he’d seen her in, was modest, but always bold and eye-catching. It also showed off the cut of her arms really well. As she got closer, Liam was able to make out nice jeans and flip-flops. Her hair was half-up, and she had worn make-up this time. She was always pretty, but this just about put him over the top. Now, add to that his total elation at her presence, and he could imagine how he looked to her. He knew he had a big, dopey grin on his face, but couldn’t help it.

“Hey dude,” she greeted. “Nice hat.”

When she smiled at him, Liam was sure he was about to fall over dead. “Thanks,” he said, still smiling. “You look…nice.”

Morgan nodded her thanks, and sat down with Aaron and Bryan who had walked up with her. “Coby still not back yet?” she wondered. Morgan had a feeling Jess might be disappointed this time if she didn’t see him.

“Haven’t seen him,” Aaron admitted. “I heard him leave at, like, six, though.”

“I didn’t see Nate in class this morning,” Liam remembered.

“He’s helping Coby,” Bryan filled in.

Jon stalked up moodily. “Someone took two of the damn doughnuts this morning, and made coffee that tastes like pumpkin.”

“You bought those for all of us,” Liam reminded. “It was probably Nathaniel on both counts, though.”

“Am I on trial for something?” Nate asked, not missing the once-over Liam was giving him. But Nate knew he was safe. Grey sweat-shorts, blue tee shirt with a cartoon guy on the front, flip-flops that were falling apart, and paint flecks everywhere.

“Yeah, give me back my doughnuts,” Jon grumbled.

Liam shook his head slightly. The cartoon on Nathaniel’s shirt was a head with arms and legs coming straight out of it. MR. MISCHEIF was in bold letters across the top. He was pushing it, but Liam knew he couldn’t rightly comment on it, since Nathaniel wasn’t overtly breaking any rule. And that was probably just the way he wanted it. He was a button-pusher.

“We ate ‘em,” Coby filled in, glancing around quickly for Jess. Though he didn’t see her, he was happy to see Morgan. “Hey, glad everybody’s in one piece!” he greeted.

“Yeah,” she laughed. “Lucky for us, they’re pretty hard-headed.”

Legend and Emily turned up together at the last minute, with Libby literally running to catch them, looking like she’d just rolled out of bed, with messy hair, star-and-moon pajama pants and a pale yellow sweatshirt.

Having gotten up early for a run, Legend was still in her jogging clothes - sweats and a purple tee shirt. She was still sweaty and mad at herself for not grabbing a shower and being a little late. Now she was going to be gross all day.

Emily had given up wearing Legend’s shirts and was wearing a cute polka-dotted summer top of her own, with pink leggings and high-top sneakers. Her straight black hair was pulled into a side-ponytail, held in place by a pink puffy scrunchie. She had on chunky bracelets, big hoop earrings and plenty of blue eye shadow and bright pink lipstick. Her snack of the day? Cheetos.

“The eighties called,” Aaron ribbed. “They want their look back.”

“Were you even alive in the eighties, Em?” Bryan wondered.

Emily indignantly crunched on a Cheeto. “Yes! For two years!”

Coby put his chin in his hand, feigning depression. “Shit, I feel old…”

Liam impatiently looked at his watch. Jess was officially late. But then, what could he expect?

“Sorry,” Jess exclaimed, breathless. She collapsed comically on the grass between Legend and Morgan.

Liam looked disdainfully at her. Jess didn’t even care about her own appearance. Her hair was in a messy French braid, she had no make-up on at all, and was wearing some baggy plaid shirt, worn jeans and running shoes with holes in the soles.

“What’s Christian up to today?” Morgan wanted to know. Now, instead of wanting to check on him after they were finished, Jess had figured out that if she rushed, she could usually manage to see him for a few minutes before Bible study.

“They were making handprints,” Jess said, her eyes lighting up, and her voice full of love. “I came just in time to see CJ do his. They’re like, the official ones, in the clay, like your mom has, Legend,” she explained. “He was so happy I was there. I can’t wait until it dries, and he brings it home.”

Coby smiled, feeling the outline of several little plastic jars of Libby’s paint in his pocket.

“Okay, well, we’re running late, so we should get started. We don’t have a lot of time anymore, so we’ll have to keep it under five minutes each. Let’s pray first.” Liam bowed his head, and prayed quickly and sincerely, asking God to bless their time together.

“Now. Your testimony,” Liam said, looking directly at Jess, Bryan and Nate in turn, in case they weren’t aware, “is the story of how you came to faith in God. Tell us about your family and anything important you think we should know. For example…”

Libby rolled her eyes. “Do you know how ridiculous you look in that hat?” she muttered under her breath. “I can’t take you seriously.”

“For example,” he repeated. “My name is Liam Wright. I was very blessed to be raised in a Christian home. My parents are very much in love after twenty-five years of marriage. Libby was born when I was four, and the next year I accepted Christ as my Savior, because my parents didn’t want me making a decision before I was at least school-age. But God was always very real to me. I always loved hearing Bible stories and going to church. I probably got more serious about it all, though, once I was in eighth grade. That’s when I went to Mexico for the first time, to build houses and share the gospel with the kids there. I’m passionate about missions and helping underprivileged kids. Both our parents are missionaries, so I’m big on traveling too. I can’t wait to go back,” Liam paused for breath, looking at his sister.

“Lib?”

She sighed, running her fingers through her bangs, so they hung in her eyes. She hated sharing about herself, especially right after Liam. She didn’t mind people knowing about her, but she wished she wasn’t the one who had to tell it. Anything she said after Liam was going to sound totally lame.

“Well, we have the same parents, obviously, so my testimony is basically what Liam said, but I accepted Christ when I was seven, in church. Libby ducked her head. “My family was concerned that I hadn’t yet, and there was an altar call, so I went up with the other kids in children’s church. God’s become more real and important to me over the years, so that’s good. I haven’t gone on any mission trips or anything, but I love to paint and do artistic stuff,” she shrugged, looking to Nate, who sat beside her. She prayed no one would notice that she had largely ignored her own childhood. Because there were important things. And people should know about them. But so far, whenever she talked about it, no one listened.

Nate fidgeted, feeling the huge amount of coffee he’d consumed that morning burning a hole in his gut now. What was he supposed to say? They already knew he was gay. Thank God he didn’t have to share that right now. Still, his life wasn’t the kind where he was raised a Christian and his parents were still happily married after a quarter-century. If they were, he wouldn’t have Josiah. Nate relaxed a little. He would start there.

“The thing I’m proudest of is being an older brother,” Nate spoke quietly, addressing the ground. “Josiah was born when I was three. When I was in kindergarten, I convinced him that this grasshopper wanted to hop around inside him, so he ate it, and then walked around staring at his tummy all day long. For as long as I can remember it’s just been my mom, my brother and me. So my family is the most important to me. A couple years ago, in hockey, Josiah caught another player’s skate blade in the neck. He bled everywhere and I passed out. I thought I was losing him, but God pulled him through. After that I decided I needed to get serious about my life and my future. I had no idea where Josiah would have gone if he died then, so he, my mom and I talked a lot and found a church. We made the decision as a family.”

Nate left out whole pieces - important pieces - of his childhood. How he’d met his biological dad at a Christmas party when he was eight and had no idea who he was. How his dad wanted nothing to do with him. How that same year, the kids at school started spreading rumors that he kissed another boy on the playground. How he’d been beat up and bullied so regularly through school that eventually his mom enrolled him somewhere else where he could excel, though he was still teased.

He elbowed Jon who withdrew sharply, and cleared his throat. “Uh, I’m the youngest. Got an older sister Anna and an older brother, Kyle. I’ve got a nephew and niece, Quinn and Kendall - they’re five and three - my sister’s kids. Let’s see. Parents are still together. The most important thing to me, is probably my girlfriend, Ashley. I met her in high school, and she’s awesome. So, that and my space are really important to me. I guess to be honest I’m not that into church. I’m just kind of here for something to do.”

Liam nodded. “That’s totally cool. You’re more than welcome here.”

Emily shared about her parents, and all her best girlfriends from high school who she really missed. “But I really like living with the girls now,” she qualified. “I guess I don’t remember not being saved. I think my mom said I was two or something. Oh, and I have a little brother, too. Miles. He’s sixteen. He’s a pain in the butt and I love him.”

Then Morgan jumped in to go next, despite the fact that she wasn’t seated next to Emily. She didn’t think it mattered that much. “I shared a little bit last night before I left. Came to Christ at twelve just alone in my room. Got a crazy house full of brothers and sisters. I also love sports. Skateboarding, snowboarding, pretty much anything. I love Hawaii because half my family’s from there. But I just wanted to let you guys know that Pete and Jason are going to be fine. Pete’s got a concussion, so he’s more spacey than usual, and Jason just cut his forehead a little bit and is shaken up. But I wanted to thank all you guys for praying. It meant a lot to me.” She nodded indicating someone else could go.

Liam felt his heart melt a little. He was drawn to Morgan that much more now that he knew these things about her. The fact that she’d come to her faith quietly was especially attractive and intriguing to him, since Liam had grown up in an environment where to publicly proclaim your faith was encouraged. It was expected. Morgan had come to her own faith late, but not too late. Twelve was still early enough to have developed a firm foundation, especially if you were following hard after God’s will, and Liam knew Morgan was.

Coby shared about his parents’ divorce when he was thirteen, but not how much it hurt him. He shared about getting saved at eighteen, but not about the fact that by then he’d already been getting drunk regularly for three years. He shared about Blake, but not that he was following in his big brother’s footsteps, and he shared about Riley. How she loved baseball and boy sports with as much intensity as she did her dolls and playing jacks. He didn’t share about how uninvolved and disconnected his dad was already from her, and how he worried about her even more than he did for Blake. Coby put his best self out there, adding that he was a big risk-taker and loved the water, before wrapping things up by saying that he hadn’t yet found a church to go to, but hoped to find one soon.

Aaron went next. “I was saved when I was nine, after my dad left. I guess it really hurt me and I needed something to grab onto. Lucky for me, it was God and not something bad. My sister Sofi was only three at the time, and I knew I was the man of the house and I had to take care of her and my mom. It was a lot of pressure for a kid. But God helped me out with that like He does with everything. God and family are most important. Friends, too,” he finished, grinning. He didn’t see the need to mention that he was diagnosed with dyslexia in the sixth grade - that he’d had to fight just to graduate high school with his class. This was about glorifying God, not embarrassing himself.

Bryan smiled happily and started in. “Well, as you guys know, I’m a practicing Catholic. I have been most of my life. I’ve done a lot of searching, and finally decided that Catholicism was the religion that made the most sense to me, so I chose it for myself. I’m real close to my family. My parents are still married and I have two older sisters, Vanessa and Angela, and a younger sister, Raquel. When I was in eighth grade, I started running with a gang,” Bryan paused taking in the shocked looks on his roommates faces, as well as everyone else’s. “I did a lot of bad stuff with them, the least of which was smoking and stealing. I got jumped out when I was sixteen, and my family moved away, because otherwise the gang was like an immediate threat to my family and myself. I regret that I put them in danger, and I went back to the Catholic church. I went to confession and repented and I was fully welcomed back. I appreciated that. My faith, and God have always been of the utmost importance for me, so it was very significant that they embraced me again. Now, I’m on that journey, growing and changing as a man, and growing closer to God. I don’t believe that it happened at a certain age. That I was saved, like some of you have said. As a Catholic, I believe I am being saved, and after I die is when I’ll have my salvation.”

He saw Liam shake his head disapprovingly, but Bryan just smiled back at him. What was there to be upset about when they were talking about their journeys of faith?

Liam tipped down the bill of his Dr. Seuss hat, trying to hide his total disappointment. He would never understand why people would knowingly follow lies and worship idols, like he knew the Catholics worshipped Mary. What on earth was he going to do with this group?

Legend glanced down at her watch, and noted that there wasn’t much time left. She knew Jess was nervous, but she also knew that Jess would share everything. So Legend knew she had to be quick and thorough.

She shared about her parents, and being an only child. About becoming a Christian at eleven. It was right around the time when Jess started getting in more trouble, but Legend didn’t mention that. She talked about how important her faith was, and how important her education was. She admitted to getting drunk once at a party at the end of senior year. How she’d confessed and repented. She had a pretty boring testimony, especially in light of what Bryan just shared and what Jess was about to. But Legend knew it wasn’t about that.

Jess looked at Legend nervously, took a breath, and started in. “My mom abandoned me in a movie theater when I was three years old.” Jess said that first, knowing it would be the hardest. She made herself look everybody in the eyes. “She left me there, probably so I could be entertained for a couple hours and she could get a head start wherever she was going.”

Liam sat forward, knowing he was hearing important information about this girl who needed so much help. He knew he couldn’t be everything for everybody, but Liam could do his best to get Jess the healing she needed. The rebellious stuff - the piercing, the tattoo, and the child - made even more sense now. Liam wasn’t okay with them, by any means, but he understood how they could come to be.

“Once the movie was done, I expected my mom to be there but she wasn’t. So I just wandered around looking for her outside. I wasn’t dressed right for the weather. There was some snow on the ground and I didn’t have boots, I remember. I walked to the liquor store next door. That’s where she usually went, but she wasn’t there. Finally somebody found me. And I got taken to emergency placement for a night, because I wouldn’t talk to them and they didn’t realize I even had a dad until he filed a missing person’s report. It was scary being away from home with strangers, but no more scary than it was living in my house every day, worrying about messing up somehow and making my mom mad.

“The abandonment really messed me up, and even after me and my dad moved, I acted out and got in all kinds of trouble. By thirteen I’d lost my virginity, by fifteen I was pregnant, and my dad disowned me, and a friend‘s family took me in.”

Legend squeezed Jess’s limp hand, offering support where she could.

Jess plowed ahead, feeling the judgment from Liam, and probably everybody else, too. “Weeks after I turned sixteen, I had Christian. I was living in a bad situation again and knew I had to do better. I had someone else to be responsible for now. I made the decision to change how I was living when Christian was around a year old.”

She glanced down at her watch, seeing that time had gone over, and she and Morgan were now going to be late. “Anyway, that’s it,” she said, wishing she didn’t sound so defensive.

Jess stood up, ignoring the faces around her. It wouldn’t matter now. So she didn’t let their expressions get to her. Not Emily or Libby who were crying, Morgan or Nathaniel who looked startled, or Liam who looked angry.

“So…about your face…” Jon said expectantly, finally voicing what everyone else had been wondering since she started talking. The others might have been afraid to press the point but Jon wasn’t. He was nothing if not blunt.

“What about it?” Jess asked, hedging, her hand inexplicably going to her keychain in her pocket where she kept her pepper spray.

“Who beat the shit out of you and the kid?”

Jess immediately felt James breathing on her neck - his knife against her.

“You know, if you just get rid of that kid, we’d be good to go.”

Nausea settled in her stomach, and Jess felt cornered. She had no choice. She had to say something.

“I was attacked this summer. Christian and I were living in a hotel because money was tight. We’d run out of everything, and I hadn’t even been able to give him supper that night. I knew we had to get to the store. I couldn’t let him miss two meals, so we went. On the way back, this guy said for me to give him my money. I thought it was a joke until I felt the knife. He started kissing me and I fought him. Then he got violent. I’d sent Christian for help but he heard me scream and came back. Christian got hit. When I heard him cry, something snapped in me. The guy was kissing me, so I bit him as hard as I could. I took CJ and we hid in the back of the store for an hour or something until I was sure he was gone.”

By the end of her explanation, Legend could see Jess had gone pale. Her hand was in her pocket, and, she knew without seeing it, closed around her pepper spray. Legend was careful not to touch her.

Jess pushed past them all and walked to the parking lot. She felt sick and her head pounded. She got to Morgan’s car, walked around it, and was sick beside the rear tire. Jess had never told the whole story - not even Legend knew the specifics of where she had been left when she was abandoned. No one knew that in seventeen years, Jess had never set foot in another theater.

She was leaning against the car, when she spotted Liam coming toward her fast. The lame hat was still on his head.

“Wait a minute,” Liam said sternly. “You are telling me Christian wasn’t fed? You were living in a hotel?”

Jess tried to walk away, but when he came around her and grabbed both arms firmly, Jess panicked. She brought her knee up into his groin, pulled out her keys and sprayed him with her only weapon.

Liam screamed so suddenly that Jess jumped back, shocked that she’d actually used pepper spray on someone. His knees had buckled with the kick, and he screamed in pain while Jess stood back, shaking. Tears came, and she let them. She couldn’t help it. All she could think of was James and the way he’d grabbed her, beaten her, and would have done more, if she hadn’t reacted.

She retreated further, barely registering the sound of feet running. But all of a sudden Morgan had Liam, and Legend had Jess and was taking the pepper spray from her.

“What happened?” Morgan demanded.

“Jess sprayed him,” Legend relayed, holding up the pepper spray to show. “It’ll hurt for a while, but he’ll be okay. Bring him somewhere to wash his face and eyes out,” she advised.

Behind them, Libby was hysterical, wanting to know what happened to her brother, and Emily was just as bad or worse. All the guys were stunned into immobility except Coby, who moved to the other side of Morgan to help Liam get where he needed to be. Jon snickered behind a hand, Bryan just stared and Nate studied the scene seriously.

He didn’t like Liam, but here Liam was in a position Nate had been in countless times. Nate had trouble thinking of Liam as the victim in this situation. He knew from looking at Jess that Liam probably had this coming.

Jess was shaken up, and looked pale and wary. Her fists were clenched tight at her sides, and she was so tense she nearly vibrated. She was trying to keep herself together, Nate knew. He had done this often - was skilled at it. Jess’s tears didn’t take away from her strength. He watched, as Legend approached Jess slowly.

“Are you okay?” Legend asked, standing right in front of her friend.

Jess blinked, shaking her head slowly. Talking about it brought it all back.

She had just been abused as a very little girl.

Just been abandoned.

Just been disowned.

Just been attacked…

The memories were back and vivid now.

Jess couldn’t imagine how she would ever be okay again.