Stowaway: Chapter 10

It’s been a little more than two weeks since Liam went totally crazy on me, which means I don’t look as bad and I’m not as sore. Tonight, we are having a special Birthday Madness for Christian, since he’s turned eight this morning. He doesn’t know it, but we are all dressing like pirates. Jon told me my name is Pirate Hester the Black. Trust me; it is not as bad as Emily, who has to go by Lazy-Eye Jean.

Jess worked quickly to finish up Christian’s cake. She put little pirate figurines on the ship and wrote with icing in the waves. “Ahoy! Christian is 8!”

Right now, he was skating with a friend, but the friend’s mother knew to drop Christian off right at five o’clock, since that’s when the festivities began.

Impatiently, Jess moved her pirate dreads over her shoulder. Emily was in charge of make up and now Jess looked “like a proper wench” according to Emily. Jess was sure that “wench” was pirate for “slut” but didn’t comment on it. She also wore a white peasant blouse, like all the girls and a flowing red skirt, with some kind of beaded belt-looking piece around the waist. Just what Jess needed. Something to draw attention to her ever-expanding belly.

She was still shocked that people hadn’t found out, but with all the drama Liam stirred up, it was no wonder that sharing the news of her pregnancy had fallen by the wayside. Coby, of course, was upset, but even he had to agree that the best gift they could give Christian was the promise that in the spring, he would have a younger sibling. It would be a surprise for everyone else, too.

Positioned by the door, Emily, or Lazy-Eyed Jean, was dressed in a ridiculous Artemisia blouse, tight black pants and a pirate hat. The costumes, of course, had been Emily’s department. She had gone thrift store shopping, and found various pieces, including ones for Christian, and she hadn’t needed to spend a lot of money.

Libby, despite having the pirate name Hester the Black, was dressed in a full-length, white chemise, which went easy on her still-healing body, and was easy to get in and out of. Emily was a miracle-worker, and gently smudged make-up on Libby’s face to not only make it appear dirty, but to hide the fact that she was still bruised.

Morgan shocked them all when she arrived in an ankle-length purple dress, and a red cloak of a similar length, complete with a hood and a gypsy feather fan. To Jess’s knowledge, Morgan had not worn a dress in at least three years. Jess didn’t even think she owned one.

“What do you think?” Morgan asked, turning in a fast circle, clearly a little uncomfortable but willing to go with it.

Jonathan came in behind her. “You look gorgeous,” he told her honestly, giving her a kiss. “Now are you gonna get in the make-up line to wait for Lazy-Eye Jean, or am I?” he asked smiling.

He had come dressed in his pirate best. He hadn’t needed Emily to shop. Jon just busted out his red renaissance shirt, with puffy cuffs. The long black frock coat and the tight black pants. They made it hard to move, but Christian was worth it. He even had pirate boots, a rope-belt, and had brought his sword. He sat down in the make up chair.

“What do you want?” Emily asked, her eyeliner pencil poised like a dart to throw.

Jon shrugged. “I don’t know. Give me some of that eye stuff, some facial hair, and make my scar noticeable. Christian always thought it made me look like a pirate,” Jon said and smiled.

Nate and Cary came a little later, dressed in their Halloween costumes. Cary as the pirate and Nathaniel as the parrot.

“Here, let me do your make up!” Emily demanded.

“Okay!” Cary agreed and sat down, but Nate shook his head.

“I need Morgan’s green eye-shadow for this,” he insisted, taking off to find her in the kitchen.

“Nathaniel,” Jess said slowly. “How are you going to eat my spaghetti dressed as a parrot?”

Nate shrugged. “I’ll take it off. Hey Morgan, can I borrow your…” he trailed off, noticing her for the first time. “Wow. You look amazing.”

“Thank you,” she said curtseying, “So do you. I’m glad you’re getting more chances to wear this thing,” she played with a feather, and then saw a pirate ship fully manned, floating on blue-green seawater.

“Oh, wow, Jess, this is great!” Morgan exclaimed, seeing the cake for the first time. “This looks way better than the picture I sent you!”

“Thanks,” Jess sighed. “Let’s see…spaghetti’s warm on the stove. Garlic bread’s in the oven. …What are we gonna do for drinks?”

“Don’t worry! I’ve got punch ingredients!” Morgan announced, picking up the bag that also held Christian’s present and taking out a huge bowl, pineapple, orange, and lemonade concentrate, 7Up, rainbow sherbet, and oranges bananas and kiwis.

“Um…Honey?” Coby called.

“Yeah?” Jess returned, heading down the hall.

“We’ve got a problem,” he said, dressed in his black shirt, bandana and pirate pants.

Jess’s eyes widened as she saw the mess in their bedroom. Somehow, their darling dog had nosed it open and found Christian’s big birthday gift - an Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom Lego set that they had only been able to afford recently - and chewed a hole right through the box.

“Snoopy, what did you do?” Jess asked, picking up the puppy and staring into his sad face. “What? Huh? What are we supposed to give Christian now that you ate the box? That is not nice,” she said firmly, in the voice she used to talk to Christian when he was a baby. Then, she set him down in the doorway. “You go play with Linus now. I think Cary went back to get him.”

“Cary!” Coby called. “You got Linus out there?”

“Yup! He’s here!”

“Call our dumb dog to come play with him! I need to do some fast repair work on this present.”

--

Christian was so excited. First, he got to go skating at the rink with his best buddy and now he was getting dropped off just in time for Monday Madness with all his grown-up friends. His mom had even let him pick out what they were having. Of course, he picked spaghetti because it was his favorite, but only when his mom made it. When he walked inside, it was dark, lit by just candles with The Pirates of the Caribbean soundtrack playing.

“There’s pirate gear in your room,” Emily said, wearing an eye patch and a hat and a funny shirt.

“Aye-aye, Captain!” Christian said.

Smartly, he ran to his room and found just what Emily said: a white pirate shirt with laces. There was also a red vest, black pirate pants, a pirate hat, an eye patch and a sword. “Yes!” Christian screamed, and put on all the stuff. When he came out, Emily drew a moustache and a beard on him, just like what happened at Morgan and Jon’s.

His mom and dad and all his friends were dressed like pirates and would only answer to pirate names. Even Snoopy and Linus were dressed up. Snoopy was Stitch because he ate everything, and Linus was The Cowardly Lion because someone hurt him and made him afraid.

“Who’s Nathaniel?” Nathaniel asked with an English accent when Christian asked whose parrot he was. “I’m Polly! I don’t belong to no one, and don’t you forget it!” Then, he squawked.

After that, Christian said “Ahoy!” to everybody and asked, “What be yer name?” He already knew his mom and dad’s and Morgan and Jon’s. Libby was Hester the Black and Emily had the funniest name: Lazy-Eyed Jean. It made Christian laugh so hard, especially when she made her eye do a weird thing. Cary wasn’t Cary anymore, but Pirate Walt The Cash-Strapped. When Christian asked if he could have some, Pirate Walt growled and mumbled something about eight-year-olds tasting good in stew.

They had spaghetti for supper and cool pirate punch to drink. It tasted like a party in his mouth. Pirate Walt told stories about buried treasure, how much he loved his wenches and mates, and how, one day, he was going to sail around the world, with his parrot, Polly, and be the happiest person on the seas.

Morgan - Tax Evadin’ Shannon Dregg - told a sad story about the nastiest pirate of them all, Calico John Cutty, once tried to kidnap her and make her his slave. Christian wasn’t dumb. He knew it was a real story, and that Morgan just needed to talk, the way he sometimes did, and the way his dad sometimes did, about that really bad day. Christian’s favorite part of the story was when all the other pirates worked together, and escaped John Cutty’s evil clutches.

Lazy-Eyed Jean just acted crazy and slurped her spaghetti really loud. Even his mom and dad were telling stories. His dad, about building a plank for Pirate William the Bald to walk. His mom about what was really in her spaghetti.

“Mmm…” Jon grunted. “Love eatin’ leftover-scallywag!” Then he took a big bite.

“Hey! You called me a scallywag the other night!” Christian objected.

“Better behave then. Or you’ll end up in Pirate Gertrude’s spaghetti,” Libby said with a wink. Then, she was Hester the Black, just like that, saying, “Please sir! I want some more!” and eating whatever noodle or garlic breadcrumb someone gave her.

Then, his mom, Pirate Gertrude, said it was time to open presents. By then, the lights were all turned on and the music was off, so they could hear each other. Christian saw six presents on the living room floor and felt a little disappointed. He had been hoping for at least eight, since he was eight now. But he got over it pretty quick when he was actually opening up the presents.

He did all the cards first. The only one he remembered was from Legend. It was plain and inside, she wrote. “Happy birthday! I hope eight is great for you! Miss you so much! Let’s Skype soon! Love, Legend.” He remembered it because of the message and because she sent him eight dollars.

His mom kept those, and the paper check, frowning to herself saying that she didn’t have to do that. Christian knew about the checks and about the savings account Legend had been putting money in since he was a baby. Legend told him before he left that she was like his aunt and aunts could give money to their nephews for college. He tried to tell his mom that, but she didn’t listen. His mom appreciated the help, but she was also kind of proud, so it was hard for her to accept.

First, he opened up a cool Harry Potter Monopoly game from Cary. He got an awesome game called Apples to Apples Junior that was for nine year olds, but Libby got it for him! Emily got him a make your own chewing gum kit. Nate got him a Bionicle. Jon got him Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.

“It was the longest book I could find that an eight year old would be into. I figured that way, you could get lots of reading minutes in. And if you like it, there‘s apparently more.”

“Thanks! I never read this!” Christian said. He was already imagining how the book would sound before bed, in the morning, and in the middle of the day. He heard it being read by all his friends’ voices.

Morgan’s present made him smile. It was small, but it was still good. She got him the new TobyMac CD called Tonight. It was special because only Christian, his mom and Morgan really liked rap music.

Then, it was time for his mom and dad’s gifts. His dad came out of their room, where all the presents were kept, carrying a huge present wrapped in balloon wrapping paper.

“Snoopy chewed the box a little,” Coby apologized, “But he didn’t hurt anything inside it.”

Christian tore it open and screamed. It was what he always wanted. The Indiana Jones Lego set! It even looked good to him with the corner chewed. “Oh, holy crap! This is the coolest thing ever! Thank you, Mom and Dad!”

“You’re welcome,” Jess said, laughing, as Christian launched himself at them. “Now, who wants cake?”

When everybody got up and headed to the kitchen, Jess and Coby snagged Christian by a belt loop.

“Hey,” Jess whispered. “You only had seven presents.”

Christian shrugged and smiled, showing off the huge gap in his teeth. “It’s okay. They were really good ones.”

Really, it was okay. Christian could still remember birthdays from a long time ago, when his mom couldn’t afford any presents at all for him. He said it was okay then, because he didn’t want her to feel bad. Now, to have a party so big and special like this was better than anything he could make up in his mind. He even felt a little selfish, telling his mom and dad he wanted eight presents. Some kids got no presents at all. But his mom and dad didn’t look at him as if he was selfish. They looked like they had a secret. Christian made himself sit really still and not ask what it was or where they hid it. He was good at being patient anyway. Then, he thought again, and decided not to hope too much. It might be a bad secret and he didn’t want to be let down.

“Well, the thing is… Your eighth present…” Coby said, hedging on purpose. “It’s kind of already here and we can’t really take it back.”

Christian’s eyes widened. “Oh! That’s okay! That’s great!”

Jess looked at Coby, suddenly apprehensive. Christian changed his mind all the time. What if, by now, he didn’t want a younger brother or sister anymore? But Coby nodded.

“Christian…I’m pregnant…” Jess said, studying his face for a reaction.

“Oh, yes!” he cheered, pumping his fist. “That’s the best present ever! Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Jess smiled and reached out for his hand, placing it on her stomach. “In there, is your little sister, AJ…”

Christian’s brows were furrowed. “Are you sure she’s in there? I don’t feel anything.”

“Trust me,” Coby said, laughing. “She’s in there.”

“Well, when is she done? You know, like, when can she come out?” Christian asked, smiling. “’Cause I really want to see her and play with her.”

“The end of April,” Jess said, feeling relieved.

“Are you gonna tell everybody now?” Christian asked. “Because I don’t think I can keep this a secret.”

“We’re telling them right now,” Coby said, picking up Christian.

“But we had to tell you first,” Jess interjected.

“Because she’s my birthday present, I know,” Christian nodded. “Come on!”

Jess laughed. “That’s exactly right.”

“But wait for Mom. It’s her news. She gets to tell, because she’s doing all the work,” Coby said, rubbing his beard against Christian’s cheek and making him laugh.

--

By the time they made it back out to the kitchen, Jon was waiting impatiently with the lighter. “It’s about damn time, you guys! I want some cake!”

“Holy cow. Is that mine?” Christian asked, staring in fascination at the huge pirate ship cake.

“You got it,” Jess said. “Happy birthday, CJ.”

Despite both Coby and Christian giving Jess looks, she shook her head. They were going to light the birthday candles and sing Happy Birthday before any announcing was done.

The second Christian blew out the candles, he looked at his mom and cleared his throat.

“Our family has announcement to make,” Jess said casually, cutting slices of ocean for the guests. “I’m pregnant.”

There was a beat of silence and the room exploded with cheers.

“And!” Jess shouted over the noise, “We’re having a girl!”

“Shit, girl. How far along are you?” Cary asked, taking a big bite of cake.

“Five months…” Jess mumbled.

“Five months?!” Emily exclaimed. “How come you didn’t tell us sooner?”

“Because AJ’s my birthday present!” Christian said loudly, taking a big bite of cake.

“Anna Jaclyn,” Jess supplied, silencing the curious looks and questions about the initials.

While they ate, everyone took turns coming around the table and congratulating Jess, Coby, and Christian, on the new addition to their family. Libby looked on smiling. It wasn’t that long ago that they were all doing the same thing, because Coby had finally proposed.

“Wait! Don’t we have another surprise?” Christian asked, as they were cleaning up. He came closer and whispered to Coby, “You know. For Libby.”

“We were going to wait for Christmas, right?” he asked.

“I really want to share my birthday with her, though. And we’re all here.”

Coby stood up. “All right. The birthday pirate has spoken. Libby…I mean…Hester… the fun’s not over yet. Come with us.”

“What?” Libby asked. She looked around at the faces of her friends, but they all just smiled knowingly. Nathaniel nudged her with his feathery body. “Go on. It’s good, I promise, you’ll like it.”

“You guys! My birthday’s not for months!” she objected, as Cary held her hand and walked her down the stairs. Behind them, Morgan and Jon had started singing a rousing chorus.

“Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me! We pillage plunder, we rifle and loot! Drink up me hearties, yo ho! We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot! Drink up me hearties, yo ho!” they sang, clinking their glasses of punch together.

Emily joined in, inexplicably knowing not only the first verse Morgan and Jon were singing again and again, but every other verse, too. Slowly, more joined in, except for Libby who was too curious about what was going on, and Coby and Jess, who were too far ahead. Even Christian knew the song, because the Jonas Brothers had recently done a cover.

When they finally reached the bottom, they turned right down the hall, and left again, in the opposite direction of their bedroom. Libby blinked. The light was on, and ahead was the door to the room Coby was cleaning out, but now, it had a simple wooden sign hanging on the handle. It was painted lavender with yellow hearts. It said, Libby’s.

“Isn’t this going to be the baby’s room?” Libby asked, confused.

She felt anxiety rise up in her suddenly. The last time she had been in that room, Liam had beaten her. Christian had been given responsibilities he never should have had to been given. Libby swallowed.

“Open the door and find out,” Coby urged.

--

Nothing could have prepared Libby for what she found.

When the door was pushed open, Libby gaped in shock. All her nervous feelings were gone, and she couldn’t believe her eyes. Even though it was night, the room was lit beautifully with all kinds of light. The floor was vinyl but looked wooden. There was a sink right next door. Inside was too amazing to look at directly. There was a huge U-shaped desk, her easel, new pants and brushes, cups that held pens and chalk and odds and ends for collages. Yellow and green beanbags sat against one wall. A pegboard.

It was an art studio. It was her art studio.

“You guys…” Libby gasped. “You didn’t have to do this. It‘s too much.”

“Go on in and check it out,” Morgan urged. “I tried to get all the stuff you liked but I didn’t really know the names of everything and some of it wasn’t in the budget. But I hope its okay.

Stunned, Libby walked deeper into the room. Only then did she notice the second window that had been installed. The big box fan for ventilation. Her friends had really done their homework. But right now, they stood back, letting her take in everything.

Lavender and light yellow handprints were all over one wall, with names beneath them.

“We saved you a space,” Cary said. “Whenever you want to add it, you’re more than welcome,” he said.

“Oh, my God, you guys! I can’t believe this!” she said, feeling tears sting her eyes.

“Libby! Look up!” Christian called from the doorway.

Overwhelmed, Libby did, and she was shocked to see the masks, hanging from the ceiling above her head. The Thanksgiving art project Libby had done with them. They were suspended with string so fine Libby had to squint to see it. For a long time, she just stared.

“Did you see your gallery?” Nate asked, stepping into the room. By now, he had shed his parrot costume and was totally comfortable walking around in his shorts and tee shirt with traces of Morgan’s make-up on his face.

He led her to one wall. There were three double-frames that looked homemade and six paintings that looked familiar:

The top left frame held Coby’s Helplessness painting. His leg, which he had painted in the shop with her. It was vivid and disturbing in its life-likeness. Libby looked closer and could see that HELPLESSNESS by: Jacob Walker was carved into the bottom part of the frame, beneath the work. Beside helplessness, in the right-hand frame, there was HAPPINESS by: Christian Walker - a red-and-orange swirl that Christian said were leaves, because he loved playing in them and they were beautiful.

In the middle, on the left, was Christian’s Fear. He painted it yellow because it was a strong color, and his fear was very strong. Tears sprang to Libby’s eyes as she saw that Christian had written his questions to Jess himself, on the front of the painting. Beside this, of course, was Jess’s Love. It was simple but so very powerful, especially when paired with Christian’s painting. It was more than art. It was a conversation between mother and son.

And below that, was Christian’s Sadness. Blue like tears and green like being lost in the woods, Christian had said. Beside this, was Coby’s Strength and Power - the spider web of names all connected to one another.

Libby could feel her friends behind her now, staring at the art, just like she was, traveling with her from place to place.

“You made these, didn’t you?” she asked Coby, shocked.

“And the desk,” Jess added, and Libby’s mouth fell open.

Numb with surprise, Libby moved on to the second wall, where two pairs of paintings hung.

First, was Christian’s Loneliness. Gray like a cloud on a rainy day, and like his last name that he didn’t have anymore. And beside that…Libby’s breath caught. It was her own painting. Tolerance, with the Chinese symbols and the smaller symbols in all four corners, representing all different kinds of love between people. TOLERANCE by: Elizabeth Wright & Nathaniel Barrett-Mackey was carved into the frame beneath the picture. She touched the wood gently.

“I always wanted to be an artist,” she said to herself, letting her eyes travel to the set of frames below it.

Christian’s Anger was there, big and black, covering the entire page. Like a volcano or a storm, he said later. But beside it was the picture Libby had tried to paint the day she was attacked. Nathaniel had done the actual painting. Her own fear obscured by vivid red self-worth and the memory of Christian’s red jacket. She had titled it Superhero. But Christian had re-titled it, and it looked like Christian had won. REAL MAN By: Elizabeth Wright & Nathaniel Barrett-Mackey hung as if it was meant to be there - despite its awkward structure and messiness - the opposite of anger was a real man, indeed.

Finally, she moved to the third wall, surprised to see paintings there that she had never seen. On the top, left, there was a painting of the earth, with a crazy combination of colors streaking the sky around it. Libby referred to the bottom of the frame, and smiled. CHAOS By: Cary Barrett-Mackey. And beside it, was Nathaniel’s Peace, where he drew the place where he felt the safest - the church - surrounded by beautiful leaves, the border still was bumpy and puzzle-shaped, suggesting something bigger, but only focusing on this small piece.

“I love this, Cary. Thank you,” she breathed.

“Hey, that’s Morgan!” Christian exclaimed, staring at one of the pictures at the bottom.

Libby looked down and felt a shock run through her as she saw ADDICTION by: Morgan Davis so prominently displayed. There was the mirror, and the smoke surrounding it. The reflection of the pills and drugs she had taken. Libby squinted. There was something else new. In the mirror, was the note she’d left. Libby didn’t have to ask. She knew it was the real thing. A tiny scrap of paper. Disjointed handwriting, begging them to let her go, because “smoke and mirrors are all that’s here.”

Because she couldn’t look at it anymore, Libby put it out of her mind and prayed to see better things on the other side. What she wasn’t expecting was that same mirror, drawn just in pencil, and in it, the clear reflection of a woman’s face. The eyes were sharp and focused, a little angled at the outside. The nose was exact and the mouth, while not smiling outright, carried an expression of contentment. Automatically, her eyes focused on the frame, and bit her lip to keep her emotions in check. The pencil sketch was FREEDOM by: Jonathan Mitchell.

“Jon, I didn’t know you could draw…” she managed, and she didn’t. As far as she knew, Jonathan had no artistic ability whatsoever, but here was proof that the opposite was true. And here was proof that on the other side of addiction there was freedom.

Libby didn’t wait to hear his answer. She couldn’t, because she was already studying the painting she had done the first night she had been here. Independence was just as it had been. Tiny fireworks lighting up a pitch-black night. Libby remembered sneaking out to Coby’s shop to paint it. Remembered the feeling of not being able to rest until it was done. The release of it being complete, and the feeling of truth it carried with it.

Slowly, she focused on the painting beside it, another new one. A photo collage of Libby and Emily’s cross-country trip. There they were standing outside The Beast, before they took off. A picture of Emily loading boxes into the back, with CVT written below it. Next was a picture of the giant sundaes they both had gotten at Culver’s when they dropped off the first round of donations. A picture of the lights on the Chicago street and then of the McDonald’s, a clear reminder of when they had found the little boy. There they were outside of Target in South Bend, shopping for more donations. In Erie, helping set up for the garage sale. A picture of their hands, in Buffalo, as they both tied knots on the edge of the fleece when they were Blanketeers. And a picture of Emily in Syracuse, pretending to eat a huge box of donations that Libby had just put into The Beast for transport. And, in the center, was a picture of the two of them standing on Jess and Coby’s front step, smiling.

This one - the one beside Independence - was SUPPORT by: Emily Stewart.

Libby couldn’t help it. She went around, and one at a time, hugged her friends and told them how much this meant.

“We made it,” Emily said simply.

Libby put an arm around her, bumping into something hard and frowning.

“Why do you have your camera?” Libby asked, confused.

“Because! You didn’t think I’d make a whole photo-collage and not document this moment forever, did you?”

“Okay, get together everybody. This is a photo opportunity so look good! One, two, three!” Emily counted.

So, they moved close to one another, and they smiled.

--

Later, when Libby printed an eight-by-ten for her studio, she studied the faces who smiled back at her. It was a great picture, with everybody gathered close - huge grins on genuinely happy faces.

Christian, standing right in the middle of all of them, with his pirate costume and almost no teeth. Nathaniel with his parrot hat, tee shirt and shorts, Cary, with his pirate getup, planting a kiss on Nate’s cheek. Coby, dressed in his Puffy Shirt Stu best, with his arm around Jess. Jess with her head on Coby’s shoulder, and her hand resting protectively over baby Annie. Jon and Morgan, with huge smiles, clinking their glasses of punch, and looking like they were about to go into another round of A Pirate’s Life for Me. Emily, standing with her arm around Libby, smiling hugely. And Libby, surrounded on one side by Christian and the other by Emily, looking genuinely happy, with tears shining in her eyes.

There they all were:

Christian: her happiness. Emily: her support. Coby: her strength, and Jess: her love. There was Cary, her sweet chaos, and Nathaniel, her gentle peace. There were Morgan and Jon, living examples that on the other side of the darkest day of your life, there was freedom to be claimed.

And there was Libby, the stowaway, who, in herself, knew chaos and peace. Fear and love. Sadness and power. Anger and how it felt to be protected by a real man.

Who escaped because she could, and embraced the life she knew was waiting.