Lucky and Bert are my heroes. They found Liam in his room at the Stowe Mountain Lodge. He apparently confessed to assaulting me and then asked for a lawyer. I don’t know what will happen, but hope there won’t be a trial. That’s the last thing I need. I hurt. I look like a prizefighter with my nose and eyes bruised and swollen. CJ got to go spend the night with Jon and Morgan watching pirate movies. Cary says I’m not missing anything, but I wish I was there.
When Christian got to Jon and Morgan’s house, Morgan drew a pirate-moustache and beard on him. Jon gave him a fake pirate’s earring and an eye patch. They didn’t say hi, they said “Ahoy!” They made newspaper hats and treasure maps out of regular paper crumpled up, dipped in coffee and dried with a hairdryer.
While he and Morgan were busy, Jon was making a pirates ship out of millions of big boxes. It started in the back hallway, went through the kitchen and ended in the living room. He put fake scary things inside like skulls and crossbones; a fake furry mouse and a piece of old rope.
“Arrr! Me hit the mother load, matey!” Jon said loudly, scratching his belly. He had colored in his scar, and Morgan drew a brown beard on him.
“Shiver me timbers! Smartly, matey!” Morgan said, and she and Christian joined Jon at the computer.
“Yer pirate-name shall be…” Jon eyed Morgan in her pirate hat with long black hair attached. “…Tax-Evadin’ Shannon Dregg, me beauty!”
“Aye-aye, Captain!” Tax-Evadin’ Shannon Dregg answered, sounding like a man.
“And yer name little scallywag…Paraplegic Hank Drake!” Jon announced, jabbing Christian with his pirate-sword.
Christian peeked out of his eye patch. “Arrr! What about yerself, Cap’n?”
Jon typed some more, moving his own eye patch to see. Then, he turned and smiled a scary smile, showing creepy yellow teeth. “Meself be called Smilin’ Ron Scabb!”
“Hoist the colors, Paraplegic Hank Drake!” Smilin’ Ron Scabb yelled, and Christian took off for their ship. He had to find the flag and raise it smartly; otherwise, he would have to walk the plank. He watched enough pirate movies to know what happened then.
It turned out, even though Smilin’ Ron Scabb was a mean captain with gross teeth, Tax-Evadin’ Shannon Dregg was nice. She would sneak him goldfish crackers when Smilin’ wasn’t looking.
“Time to look for the treasure, me hearties!” Smilin’ Ron Scabb announced.
“Avast, mate, Scabb be a land-lubber. Ye stick with me,” Shannon Dregg mumbled under her breath. “We’ll find the treasure.”
The treasure was marked right on their map with a big red X. That’s where the ship opened up right in front of the TV. And when they got there, Smilin’ Ron Scabb turned on Pirates of the Caribbean and they all hung out in the ship and watched the movie.
“We should watch all three movies!” Christian decided, yawning. They were done being pirates for now, and he was glad. It was hard remembering to talk like a pirate all the time.
“We’ll see,” Morgan said, putting her arm around him.
“Hey! It’s a good thing that you guys invited me over and not Cary. He doesn’t like Johnny Depp…” Christian remembered, snuggling close to Jon and Morgan.
It was cozy there, the three of them lying side-by-side on sleeping bags. Christian fell asleep before Johnny Depp could ask why the rum was gone. Jon snorted, muffling his laughter with his hand.
When the movie ended, Jon crawled out of the ship and walked to the bathroom, with Morgan at his heels. Together, they brushed their teeth, making sure to get all the black crayon off.
“Love you,” Morgan said, leaning in to kiss him.
“Mmm. Love you,” Jon insisted. “You gonna sleep in the ship with the kid?” he asked, smiling.
“Of course. It’s cool to sleep in a pirate ship,” Morgan laughed, taking off her hat and putting it on Jon.
“Night,” he said, laughing.
Morgan crawled back in the cardboard ship, smiling to herself as she saw Christian his arm around the bowl of goldfish, eye patch and hat askew. His silver earring was still in place, and his moustache and beard remained in tact.
Quietly, Morgan took out her phone, and aimed its camera at Christian, taking his picture. She was about to send it to Jess, when Christian spoke.
“I want a pirate party…” he mumbled, barely stirring.
“Yeah, we just had a fun one, didn’t we?” Morgan whispered.
Christian’s face scrunched up, angry. “No…I want a pirate birthday party,” he said, clear as day.
“Oh,” Morgan said, understanding. “Okay, I’ll tell your mom. You don’t worry about it,” she reassured, typing a message to Jess:
OMG, check out CJ tonight. And? He just talked in his sleep and told me he wants a pirate party on his birthday. Jon and I can help you plan. How’s Libby?
Moments later, Morgan’s screen lit up:
1 Text message
From: Jess Walker
Dec 3 11:10 PM
SO precious. I love him. OK. We will need your help and pirate expertise. Libby is fine. Just gave her more Tylenol. Sleeping, like I should be, but don’t want to leave alone.
--
Liam had not been able to stop shaking. He barely escaped in time to avoid the little kid finding him. Now, he was all over the news. Not the publicity Liam wanted. He wanted people to think of him as someone inspirational. He wanted to people to think of him as a man of God. Instead, the whole world knew what a monster he was. He was almost arrested. He had to ask for a lawyer. Thank God, everybody in charge had mercy and it wasn’t going to trial. Anger-management and community service would be hard, but it was the deal he had to make to stay out of jail. Liam would do anything to stay out of jail.
As soon as he had gotten back to his room, Liam had called his parents. He was a wreck, but tried to collect himself for the call. Liam did his best to make the incident sound as minor as possible, so his parents wouldn’t think he was a horrible person, but they had already seen the news.
He begged them to come and pick him up. There was no way he could board a plane and take a two-hour flight home, knowing that every single person was staring at him, and recognized his face as the man from Backward Glance, who went crazy and beat his sister. It was so humiliating. However, his dad wouldn’t give him a chance to explain. Liam didn’t get to tell him anything about how hard these last two weeks had been for him. Liam didn’t get to explain that it wasn’t his fault. Libby just made him so mad that he couldn’t control himself. No, his dad hadn’t listened at all. He just insisted that Liam call Libby personally and apologize.
Liam sat on the edge of his unmade bed, wincing as his sore hand contracted. He pushed the number one on his phone - Libby’s new number on speed dial - and waited.
--
“Liam?” Libby asked, swallowing. “Where are you?”
It scared the crap out of her to see his number on her phone. Libby hadn’t given it to him since she had it changed. She needed to know what he was thinking, and what he was planning. She needed to know if Liam was close enough to hurt her.
“Dad’s making me call and apologize,” Liam sniffled.
Painfully, Libby shifted in the doublewide recliner. This was her favorite piece of furniture in Jess and Coby’s house, because had enough room for two people. That meant Nathaniel got to sit close to her, but not close enough to jostle her. Currently, he had his head inclined toward the phone, and was listening, an unreadable expression on his face.
“Are you kidding me?” Libby managed, her heart still pounding with anxiety. Liam sounded like a child, forced to apologize without remorse. Pain shot through her head, her face and arm. “You’re calling because Dad made you? You beat me, Liam! Don’t you think that’s wrong at all?”
“Well, I wouldn’t have done it, if you had just come with me!” Liam objected. “Why did you leave? Do you hate me that much that you would leave me all alone? We’re family, Libby! Do you know how much it hurt me when you left? And then, to find out that you were never planning to come back? What was I supposed to do? You just hit me with that, out of nowhere!”
Jess rushed in then, having heard Liam’s name. “Give me the phone,” she whispered a look of fury on her pretty face.
“This was not my fault!” Libby exclaimed, ignoring Jess, tears burning in her eyes. “You losing control is not my fault! That’s about you! I…hate you…” she managed, her voice breaking. “How could you do this to me?”
Libby could feel Nathaniel put his arm around her gently. He whispered, “It’s not your fault,” so softly in her ear that it threatened to break her down completely.
“Come on…” Liam protested softly. “I didn’t mean to make you cry. Libby, I’m sorry, okay? Do you forgive me? I need you to forgive me.”
Libby just cried, as much from physical pain as from Liam’s complete lack of remorse. He wasn’t sorry for what he did. Not for calling her names, beating her up, or trying to make her a victim. He was only apologizing now for making her cry. There was no use in trying to reason with him. There was no use in anything.
“Okay,” Jess interjected, taking the phone calmly. Libby watched through tears as Jess unexpectedly tossed it to Coby. Then, Jess wrapped Libby in a quiet embrace.
“You don’t need to do anything you’re not ready for,” Jess told her. “Coby and I will take care of your phone calls from now on, okay? We’ll look out for you.”
--
Nathaniel excused himself and lingered in the doorway of the kitchen, close enough to hear Coby’s hushed voice as he reamed Liam out, and Liam‘s own voice, on the other end of the call. Nate watched as Coby paced back and forth, clenching one fist and pounding the counter top periodically.
“My dad wanted me to call her! I didn’t to it to purposely upset her!” Liam complained.
“I don’t give a damn what your dad said, Liam…” Coby insisted.
“Well, you should. It’s the truth! I‘m always the bad guy. Did you notice that? Even when I try to do something good. Does it matter? No! Everybody still takes her side over mine! You‘re always going to take Jess‘s side or Morgan‘s side, or Libby‘s side or that kid‘s side, or anybody‘s side, but mine!” Liam vented. “It’s not fair! The only thing I’m guilty of is giving the devil a foothold!”
Coby clenched his jaw tightly. “We’re taking out a restraining order, and that’s a promise. I can’t believe I ever let you around my wife. And that kid is my son. He saved Libby’s life. He’s more of a man at seven than you’ll ever be.”
Liam sighed exaggeratedly. “Oh, they were perfectly safe around me! See? Always on trial. This is exactly what I’m talking about.”
“What do you mean, ‘They were perfectly safe?’” Coby exclaimed, trying to keep his voice down. He could still hear Jess in the living room, comforting Libby. “You could have killed your sister! Raising a hand to anyone, especially a woman, is crossing the line.”
“Do you think I don’t know that? I’m not stupid, man! I know it’s wrong! I’m just saying, it wasn’t me in there! It was like something else had control of me. Dark forces. Don’t you believe in the devil? He is just as real as God is. This is none of your business anyway! It’s a family business. So, you and your wife and your kid can butt out!”
“You came into my house and did this. That makes it my business,” Coby maintained calmly.
“Tell Libby to get her stuff together. We’re going home. I’ll take that cargo van,” Liam decided.
“No. You know what? Libby’s not coming home with you. She’ll never come home with you, because she’s family. And that cargo van is Emily’s. You have no right to it.”
“Newsflash. Libby’s my sister, not yours. You don’t have a right to say what goes on in her life. I do,” Liam said, his tone smug.
Coby clenched his fist, but kept his voice level. “Family doesn’t beat family within an inch of their lives. You are not family. You’re an asshole, and if you come near her, I’ll make sure your ass is rotting in a cell. That’s a promise. Don’t come near us again. Any of us,” Coby ground out. “Libby’s not a possession, she’s a human being, and it’s time you treated her with the respect she deserves.”
“Oh my gosh! You’re talking to me like I’m some guy who beats his wife or something! This was one time! She pissed me off! After what happened with Morgan, I couldn’t just let Libby go away and kill herself too. Libby made me do it! She didn’t listen to reason. She was asking for it. So, as far as I’m concerned, she got what she deserved.”
Coby hung up then. He didn’t trust himself not to say something he would regret, or follow through on a promise to beat Liam the way Liam hurt Libby. Coby took a deep breath and turned to see Nathaniel in the doorway.
“Did he believe you?” Nate asked, taking a step forward.
“We’ll see,” Coby sighed.
--
After Libby collected herself, she had no choice but to contact her parents. They had been calling her constantly, since Liam’s picture started showing up on the news, asking if she was okay. Since Nathaniel had yet to leave her side, she had him send a text to her mom saying that she would be on Skype any minute.
Morgan had dropped her laptop off, and said Christian and Jon were cleaning up and “planning his birthday.” Apparently, that involved more talking like pirates, eating leftover Goldfish crackers and singing Yo Ho Ho and a Bottle of Rum while cleaning. When Morgan left, Jon was wearing nothing but a pirate hat and jeans. Christian was running around in his underwear, pretending to walk the plank.
She was tired and sore from spending the night in a dishwasher box on the floor, but it had been worth it. When Christian woke up that morning and the first thing he did was smile at her, Morgan knew it had all been worth it. Now, she was dressed, kind of, in sweats and the same shirt she’d slept in. She would have to make sure to get a devotional in with Jon sometime today. The pirate party kind of screwed with things, but Morgan knew she wouldn’t change it. She spent the drive over steeling herself for how Libby would look, and was glad she did. Libby looked like hell. Even worse than the day before, if that were possible. Still, Morgan smiled, and offered her laptop like a gift.
“I thought you could use this, until you can get over to the big one,” Morgan said, gesturing to the desktop behind her. “Here, it has a webcam and everything,” she said, trying to ignore how bad Libby looked this morning. Her poor mother was in for the shock of her life today.
“Thanks,” Libby said. Then she turned to Nate. “Can you talk to Mom first? So she’s kind of prepared?”
Nate nodded. He had spent the night beside her in the recliner, despite Jess keeping vigil in a nearby chair, Emily on the couch, and Coby keeping watch from the kitchen with countless cups of coffee. Cary hadn’t yet surfaced from the basement, where he was doing major overhaul in Libby’s studio, having asked her Nate her favorite colors.
“Hey, Mrs. Wright, it’s Nathaniel,” Nate said, purposely angling the camera toward himself.
She looked tired and sad to Nate, but he had never actually seen her in person. She had Libby’s eyes and hair. Her sweet nature and soft way of speaking. Nate loved her immediately and wished he could reach through the screen and give her a hug. He also wished someone had told him he would be video chatting today, so he could have fixed his hair and cleaned up a little. But at least, Libby’s mom didn’t seem to mind.
“Hi, Nathaniel,” she said, looking stressed. “Please tell me Libby’s there with you.”
“She is. She just wanted me to give you a heads-up. She’s pretty bruised and stuff.”
Slowly, he turned the laptop until Libby’s face filled the camera. “Hi, Mom,” she said, sounding stuffy and tired.
Libby heard her mom’s gasp, and wasn’t surprised at all. If it was possible, she looked worse than yesterday, with bad bruising under both eyes, a swollen nose and her arms wrapped up. She was glad the rest of the damage could be covered up. Libby looked horrible.
“I’m so sorry he did this…” her mom wept.
“It’s not your fault,” Libby told her.
“He called, wanting Dad and I to pick him up in Vermont, because his face was all over TV there, but we wouldn’t. Not after he told us what he did. I just can’t believe he hurt you like this, baby. I’m so sorry. Do you want me to come out? Do you need anything?”
Libby shook her head, the act making her dizzy. “I’m okay. Everybody’s taking good care of me.”
“Okay, well you get some rest and I’ll get in touch with you later.”
“Love you,” Libby said, and closed her eyes.
--
Liam was feeling the worst he had ever felt. It was worse than when all his former friends and Libby were attacked. Worse than when he worked in the slums of Mexico. He supposed he deserved the humiliation, but he also thought that he deserved one break in his life. His parents were always there for him, and now, all of a sudden, they weren’t. It crushed Liam’s world. He felt like he not only had no way home, but no family either. As if his parents’ absence wasn’t enough of a reminder, Liam also had his swollen hand.
He had been right about Libby giving him a disease. The mark on his hand was oozing pus and looked disgusting. But Liam knew he didn’t deserve medical care after the way he treated Libby. So he just let it fester and watched all the sin on TV, wishing he was at his home church, so he could confess his sin and be forgiven. This place only had one church and everybody there knew Libby and loved her. Everybody there would hate him.
So, he had hung around town a few extra days. He stayed in his room for days, ignoring the phone. Ignoring the door. He cried himself to sleep. He barely ate. Now, it was Friday again. A whole week had passed since things had gone so inexcusably wrong with Libby. He hoped she was okay. He hoped she could forgive him.
He would do anything if she would just forgive him. He would stand there and let Libby beat him up if she wanted to. He would take it and not fight back. He could do that one thing. But there was something else too, though it had taken him awhile to think of it.
After mulling it over for a while, Liam decided the only thing he could do was go see her. He had to be a man and apologize to her face. The plan to apologize over the phone hadn’t gone well, with Libby breaking down in tears, and Coby threatening to take out a restraining order. So, Liam would just drive over when Coby wasn’t there.
However, he wasn’t counting on Emily’s van being parked in the driveway either. He wanted to talk to Libby alone. Liam sighed. It was just as well. He might as well apologize to her, too. Libby was her best friend. Slowly, he got out of the car and trudged up the driveway, his head down. When he got to the door, he knocked and waited, knowing they didn’t have to let him in if they didn’t want to.
Emily answered the door. Her eyes were fiery and she looked at Liam as if she wanted to kill him.
“What the hell are you doing here?” she exclaimed, pulling the door firmly shut behind her.
--
Inside, Libby’s heart leaped into her throat. She never thought he would have the guts to show up here again, especially after he called to apologize. It made her sick to think about.
Though she didn’t want to, she crept down the stairs to stand behind the door to listen, as everything, Liam said and did came back to her. Moments like this, she was glad that Jon had paid for Libby to have a session from the same counselor he and Morgan saw. In fact, he gave up his own next session for her. Now, Libby couldn’t wait to go, and get all this crap out of her.
More than anything, his words hurt the worst. Him calling her a whore, and telling her he had known all these years about her abuse as a child and hadn’t done a thing, but instead blamed her. Those words had threatened to break her, but Libby held on tight, her fingers digging into everything she knew to be true. She talked to her friends, without telling them specifics.
Repeatedly, from Emily and Nate, Cary and Jess, Coby and Jonathan, Morgan and even Christian told her that she wasn’t to blame. It was Liam’s fault, not hers. Hearing it helped, but she needed to talk about it. But until then, she watched, shocked as Emily waited for Liam to speak.
--
Emily stood there, with wet hair and a bright orange shirt. To Liam, she looked like a witch. The way she just stared at him with her unblinking eyes, waiting for a response. She didn’t feel one bit of sympathy for him. He knew he looked pathetically miserable with red eyes, and hunched shoulders. He didn’t have a coat. He didn’t have shoes. Or a hat. Just a wrinkled gray tee shirt and athletic pants. His right hand was leaking nasty-looking yellow pus, where Libby bit him, and Emily and her witch-self probably couldn’t help but feel glad. It was her personality.
“I came to apologize. I wanted to tell Libby that I’m sorry, and you, too. I went off my anti-depressants and, I guess, that’s what happened…” he mumbled, not looking her in the eye. That had to help. It had to do something. Liam was sick enough to throw up right now and Emily wasn’t being forgiving at all. Didn’t she know how hard this was for him?
This was horrible. Way worse than he thought. Why wouldn’t she just let him in to talk to Libby? That would make it easier. It wasn’t as if he was dumb enough to make the same mistake twice. He would say he was sorry, and then he would leave. That was it. Tears rolled down his cheeks, and his teeth chattered. He would probably catch pneumonia out here on the step with Emily not even letting him inside.
“You don’t take anti-depressants, asshole! You didn’t believe depression was a real medical condition the last I heard!” Emily put her hands on her hips. “Now, if you don’t get your coward ass off this property, I’m calling the cops! Did you forget your sister took out a restraining order against you?!” Emily didn’t care. Let the neighborhood hear that he was breaking the law. Then maybe they would run him out of town.
“I didn’t believe in it until I got it myself,” Liam defended. “And I understand now. It’s horrible. But I didn’t know that going off them would be horrible, too. I was not myself at all, and I don’t know what happened! I just went crazy and the devil took control of me.” Liam realized that after the last week of praying. He was usually so close to God that he didn’t give the devil a foothold, but he had taken his eyes off the prize, and started backsliding without even knowing it. He was the biggest sinner ever.
“I’ll tell you what happened!” Emily exclaimed. “You stalked us, to know when we wouldn’t be home. You got Libby alone, and then you tried to force her to do what you wanted. And when she stood up for herself? When she told you no? You beat her. You kicked her and punched her and threw her into a mirror! Then, just to make sure you wouldn’t be implicated, you taped her mouth shut! She had a split lip and a broken nose. Do you have any idea how hard it was for her to breathe? How much it hurt when the cops took that off?”
“I know! I’m a horrible person! I made a mistake and I need to be punished! I already talked to a lawyer and he said there probably won‘t be a trial, since I confessed. He suggested a plea bargain and I went with that. He says I can probably get deferred adjudication since I don’t have a record and this was my first offense and I’m a respected member of the community,” Liam hurried to explain when Emily narrowed her eyes.
“I don’t care!” Emily exclaimed. “Just shut up and get out of here!”
“I just wanted to apologize and make things right. I’m sick about this. I haven’t been able to sleep for a week. Can you please just tell her I’m sorry and I love her? I can’t live like this. My own parents won’t help me. It’s just a good thing that God’s mercy is so big, because I need a lot of it right now. Anger-management is going to be so humbling.”
Emily didn’t know what infuriated her more. Liam having the gall to come around and tell her how he was suffering after the way he assaulted Libby. The lying about the anti-depressants. The feel-sorry-for-me mantra or the talk about how humbling anger-management would be. She tucked her own hands in her pockets so she wouldn’t feel the need to use them, and wring his neck.
“You are a spineless little worm,” she told him lowly. “I don’t care what your excuse is for what you did. Because I have news for you. It’s not good enough! There is never a reason or excuse to raise a hand to another person, especially a woman, and especially your little sister! Now you get out of here, and don’t even think of coming back, or I’m calling Bert and Lucky, and telling them you’re in violation of your restraining order.”
Emily slammed the door and glared at Liam through the peephole until he got in his car and disappeared down the road.
--
“Thanks,” Libby said from behind her, and Emily jumped.
“Jeez, woman! Scare me to death! What are you doing? Come on, sit down,” Emily encouraged, putting an arm around Libby’s shoulder and leading her back to the couch.
Libby hated that Liam had the power to freak her out so much that she was shaking, but she couldn’t help it. Emily sat down and put an arm around her shoulders gently.
She was healing. The bruises were turning green and yellow instead of the angry black and purple they had been in the beginning. Her arm was out of its sling, and her nose looked better. But both forearms still bore deep cuts that would most likely scar. She would have smaller ones on her face, as well.
“I’m sorry I wasn’t here to fight him off,” Emily apologized. Libby would probably never know just how guilty Emily felt for not having been there. She knew how crazy Liam had been getting and still let her go home by herself. She was regularly haunted by the thought of what might have happened if Christian hadn’t come home when he did.
Libby shrugged. “It’s fine. Besides, you were here this time and that’s what matters. I just hate this whole thing. I hate that the cops are letting him off so easy. That he has such a power over me. That I just barely got over one trauma to have him hit me with another one.”
Emily looked at her sadly. “You’re strong, though. You fought back. You said no. You did everything right.” she felt like she said this countless times but she would say it as many times as Libby needed to hear it.
“I miss church,” Libby pouted, “But I can’t go in there looking like this. I’d scare the kids.” Libby said to herself.
“You don’t scare Christian,” Emily pointed out. “And hey, everybody at church is asking about you. They want to know if you’ll be well enough for the program next week.”
“The Messiah Sing, I wouldn’t miss it. And I better get back in church,” she sighed. “I need it.”
“Come Sunday, if you’re up to it,” Emily invited. “I’ll take you home early, myself, if you’re not up to staying the whole time.”
Libby smiled, satisfied, leaning against Emily’s shoulder.
She fell asleep in no time and dreamed, for the first time since the previous Friday, of nothing at all.
--
Church was held at 8:30 in the morning, two days later, and Libby almost decided against going when she realized a few things. First, it hurt to move. It hurt more to shower. And it hurt to get dressed. It hurt to do pretty much anything. Since she had spent much of the previous week lying around doing nothing, Libby hadn’t fully appreciated that fact. But she knew she had to get up and going sometime, and church was good incentive. Libby loved the people there. She missed them.
Jess let Libby ride in the front seat of the car, while Coby, Christian and Emily all sat in back.
“Dad’s pirate name is Puffy Shirt Stu,” Christian passed along, laughing. By now, his pirate party was imminent, and he and Jonathan spent every spare moment looking up everyone’s pirate name with the pirate name generator online.
“That’s nice, honey,” Jess said to Coby, smiling. “Maybe we should play pirates.”
Christian wrinkled his nose. “That’s gross, Mom. I totally know what you’re talking about, and it’s gross.”
“How do you know what we’re talking about?” Jess challenged lightly, keeping her eyes on the road.
“Because, there’s not that many things that grown-ups do for fun. It’s kind of easy to figure out.”
Libby laughed, trying not to, because it still hurt everything in her body. To block out the humor, she put on her I-Pod.
“What’s my pirate name?” Jess wanted to know, once Libby was listening to her music. Jess felt a little bad, but knew that Libby would be laughing with them again in no time.
“Yours is…” Christian said, referring to his journalist style notepad, following the list with his pencil. “Not-So-Keen-On-The-Women-Folk…” Christian shoved the paper at Emily to have her read the last word.
“…Gertrude!” Emily announced, as they were pulling into the parking lot.
“All right. Leave the pirate list in the car. Christian, walk with Mom and Emily. I’ll walk with Libby,” Coby said. Part of this was to reinforce manners that Christian already had, and part of it was because the parking lot was so icy, and the last thing any of them needed, especially Libby, was to fall and add another injury to the list.
“Okay, are you all right?” holding firmly onto Libby’s shoulders, knowing that her arms were still sore.
“Yeah, I got it,” Libby said, dragging air between her teeth. It hurt to be tense about as bad as it hurt to laugh, but Libby was determined to make it.
Up ahead, she saw Morgan and Jon, Cary and Nate greeting Christian, Jess and Emily. Libby just hoped nobody would try to hug her or touch her unexpectedly. However, she figured with Coby there, she had a good chance of being okay.
--
“He doesn’t even have anti-depressants!” Morgan was whispering indignantly, sitting in a pew. “Seriously. I would know. He was bone dry. Wouldn’t even take Tylenol for a headache, she told Emily.
“That’s what I said. I don’t think he’s right in the head. Like, at all. I mean, anybody who thinks restraining order is code for drag-your-butt-to-the-house-and-try-to-apologize…” Emily trailed off, spinning one finger beside her head in a crazy sign.
They fell quiet as Libby came in, supported by Coby.
--
Libby was finally settled in a back pew near the door. The pastor had already come to speak with her personally, despite the fact that it meant his service would be pushed back. Libby had asked that a big deal not be made out of her return, but thanked him for his prayers. “They mean a lot and they really helped,” she said.
There was so much to love about this church. It was small, and personal. She knew and trusted everybody. The message and the music were always so positive and left her feeling lighter, not heavier like her home church. Libby loved the red cushions on the pews, the simple look, and just everything about it. It felt like home. And, she thought, remembering Nate’s painting, like peace.
She smiled as Nate came to sit beside her, in a beautiful wine-colored shirt that reminded her of the robe she had seen him in when they first met. Beside Nate on the opposite side, sat Cary, dressed in dark green. Both men wore black pants and looked so handsome. Instead of teasing them with a joke about how Christmas was still a couple weeks away, she told them both they looked nice.
They looked at her and then at each other, smiling.
Libby still thought it was the coolest thing that though Cary wasn’t a Christian, he came to church with Nathaniel once a month. It was the most romantic thing Libby had ever heard of. Love in action, to an awesome extent. She didn’t know any Christians from her home church who would even dare marry outside their own religion, much less go out of their way to show respect for the other’s religion of choice.
Down the pew, Coby sat with his arm around Jess. Christian sat between them, pink shoelaces in his sneakers, in a pristine white button down shirt and blue jeans. Coby wore slacks and a blue dress shirt and Jess in corresponding black jeans and a blue baggy sweater, her hair loose around her shoulders. Libby loved it when they matched.
Emily had put on gray pants and a matching blazer and a bright pink shirt beneath. Her hair was back in a French braid. She wore gold heart earrings and heels. Libby wasn’t wearing anything that Liam would approve of as church attire, but she didn’t care. Sweats were comfortable, and Jess’s were even a little roomier, so that Libby didn’t feel constricted. They were comfortable dark blue sweatpants and a gray sweatshirt that said I’M THE BOSS in tiny blue letters on the right side.
Morgan was looking super cute in her pink Abercrombie shirt, black undershirt and black jeans. She didn’t have enough hair to pull back, but she wore subtle makeup. Lipstick and green eye shadow that made Libby think of Nathaniel’s parrot costume. Jonathan was dressed in a white tee shirt that read JESUS IS MY HOMEBOY, with a gray open sweater, black dress pants and fancy shoes. Libby wasn’t sure if he had been in a rush that morning, or if he just felt like wearing the tee shirt.
Libby paid attention as the service started, grateful for the simple message: Love your neighbor. She listened, as Nathaniel slid his hand into hers, offering support, and she squeezed.
Afterward, Christian wove his way through the small groups of people, saying “Ahoy! God bless you!” and finally made it to Libby.
“Hey, you,” she greeted, trying not to show that she was hurting. She was sitting in another chair near the door, hoping her friends might take the hint that she was ready to leave.
“I got you an éclair. They were for the visitors, but you’re back after a long time, so I asked, and the pastor said that you counted.”
Libby smiled, remembering a time in college, years ago. Actually, it had been just before the attack. Monday Madness was at their apartment and Jess had made éclairs for dinner. Christian had been little. Probably only four at the time, and Libby had sneaked into the kitchen when Jess’s back was turned, and took one, sharing it with Christian. It was a sweet memory. The last sweet memory, before everything went dark.
“Thanks,” Libby said. “You want to share?” she asked.
His face broke into a huge grin, showing off a gap that hadn’t been there before. It was a top tooth. A front one. “I was hoping you’d say that!” he said, breaking the dessert carefully in half and giving her part.
“Did you lose another tooth when I wasn’t looking?” she asked. He seemed to be losing teeth faster than she thought possible. Now, he had a huge gap on top, and an adorable lisp to go with it.
“Yep!” he nodded, taking a big bite. “It fell out when Morgan pulled it.”
“Ouch. I would never let Morgan pull my teeth. My brother used to tie a string to the door and the other end to my tooth. Then, he slammed the door.”
Christian shrugged going quiet. “Liam’s a butt-face,” he said darkly. “Morgan just yanked it out softly. It didn’t even hurt.”
“Yeah, he is,” Libby agreed. “But he can’t bother me anymore. Because it’s against the law for him to.”
“Yeah, well it’s against the law to hit anyway, but he still did that,” Christian said, licking some cream out of the middle.
Libby patted her lap and Christian climbed carefully into it. “You know you’re my favorite?” she asked seriously.
“Mm-hm, and you’re mine. Let’s do pirate art sometime, okay?” he said. “Like, you tell me what do draw and I’ll draw it. And when your arms are better we’ll switch.”
“Sounds like a plan,” Libby said, planting a kiss on his forehead.
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