Chapter 8: Dog and Pony Show

 “Josh? Come on. Time to wake up.”

Josh whined and rolled over. “Sleepin'...”

“I see that, but you need to wake up. You're gonna see your family today.”

Liv pulled Josh's covers off, and he thought he might cry. He hugged Daniel. “Here.”

“You'll go see your family for a little while this morning and then you'll come right back here.”

Josh's head felt owie. “No...”

“I'm sorry but we need to. You can sleep in the car on the way.”

Josh's face crumbled. “No....” Cars made him feel yucky.

He cried a lot. It made his head ouch more.

Liv helped him get dressed.

Breakfast time. Josh didn't want any. He pushed his bowl away.

When the person came, Josh cried. He didn't want to go all alone. He reached for Liv but couldn't grab her.

He didn't understand going away family. Only this one.

–

Olivia supposed she should have been grateful that the kids mostly slept through the night. She had decided she'd best have Oliver and Zoey try sleeping in their own beds after things calmed down with Charlie. It had actually worked.

Zoey had gotten up once and poked her awake, wondering if it was almost time for breakfast. And Oliver had apparently sleepwalked to Noah's bedroom door, opened it, and fell asleep again in the hallway. But other than that, nothing. Nobody woke up screaming.

She had prepared herself mentally for much worse, but this, she could deal with. Now, getting Josh up earlier than usual and sending him off to contact with his biological parents and big brothers had been heartbreaking. She knew Josh didn't understand having to leave. Knew he often got motion sick on long car rides. Olivia's head still ached from his screaming and she was sad to think about him reaching out for her after she handed him off to his social worker.

Olivia shook her head. She needed to be sure the other kids had a good breakfast. Particularly, Charlie, who also had contact with her mother this afternoon.

“Where's Josh?” Zoey asked.

“Seeing his family,” Carter filled in. “When do I get to see my family?”

“Tomorrow,” Ari muttered. “Remember? We go at the same time.”

“Oh yeah.”

“Where's Harper?” Noah asked grumpily. “You guys said we both had to stay home today.”

“We did, and she is,” Liv explained. “Emma's talking to her.”

Olivia made herself breathe. The last thing she needed was attitude from Noah and Harper but she figured there would be no shortage of it, as both were being punished. Emma had been so effusive about Noah last night. She couldn't stop talking about how nice of a kid he was and he was. It was just that Liv also knew that her cousin said all the right things to your face and then, more often than not, went out and did his own thing. It was gonna take a lot from both her and Emma to convince Noah they were serious.

The house phone rang, and Charlie leaped up. “Is it my mom?”

“No. Sit down, please.”

Olivia picked up and said hello, recognizing Grace's name on the caller ID.

“Hey honey. How are things?”

“Things are fine. Josh's on his way to contact and we're just eating breakfast.” Liv said, keeping her voice level.

“Listen...I've just heard from Oliver and Zoey's social worker and it seems that they're unable to find a placement for them. So they're staying for the time being. They've also got contact with their sisters this afternoon from 3:30 to 6:30. Their social worker said she would pick them up, so just have them ready.”

“Can I tell them?” Liv asked.

“Yes. Let them know they'll be staying for the time being and that they're seeing their sisters later today. If there's a problem, give me a call.”

“I will.”

“Can you put me on speaker phone, please?”

“You guys, Grace is on the phone. She wants to talk to you,” Liv said, punching a button.

“Hello, hello!” Grace greeted, much perkier than she had been a second ago.

“Grace!” Carter cheered.

“Hi, Mom,” Noah said softly.

“Are you all behaving? You're not giving Liv and Emma a hard time, are you?”

“No,” they chorused.

“Are you coming back?” Zoey wondered.

“In a little while. William and I look forward to hearing all the fun things you did while we were gone. Now I want you to promise me to be good and help each other out. Help Liv and Emma, too.”

“Yes, ma'am,” Carter, Noah, Ari and Charlie chorused.

“Okay then. Talk to you all soon.”

“Is William there?” Carter asked. “Can you tell him I said hi?”

“Of course. Liv, darling?”

Olivia took her cue and took the call off speaker.

“Let me know if there's a problem.”

Noah was at Olivia's side just then. “Can I talk to her?”

“Noah wants to talk to you.”

“I'm so sorry, honey, Gram's awake. Tell him I'll talk to him soon.”

Liv stared at the receiver, and then at Noah. “She had to go. I'm sorry.”

“Whatever,” he shrugged.

–

The clock read 9:02 and Harper knew everybody would be upstairs by now. No fighting to get in the bathroom. And no one to stop her if she wanted to go out again. Which, she did. She didn't care what Emma's note said.

She opened her bedroom door and reared back. There was Emma, sitting on the bottom of the steps, just waiting for her.

“Good morning,” Emma offered cheerfully.

Harper made a face. So much for her big plans of escape. She and Lexie wanted to see a movie today. Looked like that wasn't happening.

“Is there someplace we can talk?” Emma asked.

Confused, Harper didn't say anything, but led the way to the den. She sat on the end of the couch, glad when Emma sat in the middle, and stood her crutches between them. Harper waited, and so did Emma.

“Just tell me,” Harper sighed. “I already know I'm in trouble. What do I have to do?”

Emma looked puzzled, but forged ahead. “I want you to stay home today.”

“And do what?” Harper asked, hating how everything she said came out belligerent. It wasn't how she meant to say it. It was supposed to just be a question.

“Just be with us,” Emma said simply. “Listen, I'm really glad you texted to let me know where you were, but you need to let us know if you're going to Lexie's first. If you just leave, we worry about where you are or what could have happened to you.”

“Nothing happened to me,” Harper laughed and it was dry. Harsh.

“Liz and Nathan drove by Lexie's. You weren't there,” Emma pointed out. “No one was.”

“So, you sent them to spy on me?” Harper asked, crossing her arms. Tears came to her eyes.

“Harper, I'm on your side. I want to help you. Can you understand that?”

“Don't you listen? No one can help me. People are gonna like me or not. Doesn't matter what I do.” She wiped her eyes and looked away. Crying never helped anything and she hadn't done it in forever anyway. Why was she starting now? Emma was gonna think she was such a big baby. “I was at the Starbucks inside Target having coffee while they were at church, okay? Then I walked around for a while until they came home and I hung out there for the rest of the day! I wasn't lying...unlike you...”

Emma raised her eyebrows. “I know you feel like I was unfair to you because you wanted to go to Lexie's after dinner and I wouldn't let you. I'm sorry you feel hurt, but I'm not sorry for setting boundaries and standing by them. You're eleven, right?”

Harper nodded.

“I remember eleven,” Emma sighed. “It was horrible. My emotions were all over the place all the time, and I kind of hated myself,” she confessed.

This caught Harper's attention. “You did? Why?”

“I couldn't accept myself. I felt like there was something wrong with me. I was the only disabled kid in regular classes at my school. No one else knew what it felt like to be me. I wanted so badly to just be like all the other kids. To be normal.” Emma put finger quotes around the word normal. “Can I tell you something personal?” Emma asked.

Surprised, Harper nodded. Adults never trusted her with important stuff.

“My parents didn't accept me either.”

“What did you do?” Harper asked.

“I'm still trying to figure that part out. I like to think that being here for you guys is a start.”

“Did your parents ever change?” Harper asked quietly.

“No.”

“Doesn't that suck?” Harper pressed.

“It does, but I just had to tell myself that, you know what, just because they can't accept me doesn't mean no one can. So, I moved out of their house and I found people who could love me for me.”

Harper thought about it. “You mean Liv?”

“Liv is a great friend. You have that in Lexie and I can see that. And I understand wanting to spend all your time there. But I want you to know that Liv and I like you very much and we want you around. You don't have to run away to Lexie's. Sometimes I might say things you don't like and sometimes you might sneak out without telling us until later where you'll be. But we work through it. Because I respect you as a person.”

Harper opened her mouth and closed it. There was so much she wanted to say, but no words came out. Instead she stood up, rolling her eyes. “I'm going to see if there's any breakfast left.”

She hurried away and up the stairs, before she made the biggest mistake of her life. Again.

–

“Hey!” Zoey said, seeing that girl Harper and running up. “Can we go inside your fort again? Will you read to us?”

“Let's let Harper eat,” the she that punished Zoey sometimes said. “I have to talk to you and your brother."

They sat in the living room. Everybody else was cleaning but Zoey didn't have to, even though she really wanted to do Josh's job of throwing down the little hole in the bathroom. Zoey had already 'vestigated and put some other stuff down there, just to see if it worked. And it did. Abracadabra.

“Are we leaving?” Ollie asked.

“Not for the time being,” the she said.

“What time is being?” Zoey asked, the words twisted inside her head. “And what's your name?” she pointed, even though Ollie said it was rude.

“It means not right now, and my name is Olivia. You can call me Liv if that's easier to say.”

“Liv is easy,” Zoey nodded.

“So, we're staying here...” Ollie said. “Is that it?”

“No. You're seeing your sisters this afternoon. It's called contact.”

“Liv,” Zoey said for practice, “you mean they're coming over?”

“No. You go see them. You know how Josh went to see his family this morning? You and Oliver get to see yours.” Liv smiled.

Zoey felt the happiest ever in her life.

Her whole family would be there. Royal, Sage, Kenzie and Daddy. It would be just like it was.

Pinkie Pie's magic worked.

--

“What are you doing? Harper asked as Carter emptied his food drawer into his Avenger's backpack.

“Mind your business,” he said, just like Olive. If he was going to see his family tomorrow that meant he had to get ready.

“You know cleaning out that drawer doesn't count as cleaning the kitchen. You still have to help,” Harper said. She liked to try and boss him when she was in a bad mood.

“I know what I'm doing,” Carter said calmly.

Sometimes, his mom and dad didn't have that much money. His contact lasted from after school until bedtime practically. His mom and dad usually always said they'd feed him and Cameron and Cora (his brother and sister) supper. Sometimes they did, but sometimes they forgot or his dad spended all the money.

Carter knew from when he used to live with his brother and sister that it was his job to take care of them. This was his food. Grace and Emma and Olive even said. He didn't have money for the vending machines there but he could bring this, and give it to Cam and Cora to be sure they had enough food.

Because that's what big brothers did.

He packed his bag full and then zipped it tight and hung it up high so Dudley couldn't reach it. He closed both doors to his and Josh's room. Carter missed Josh. He didn't have any friends in school, because he acted out and got in trouble, but Josh was Carter's friend and kind of like his brother. Plus he was even the same age as Cora. So Carter already knew how to take care of him pretty good.

Going to contact made Carter feel excited and good. So he helped Noah clean the mirror and the sink in the bathroom and didn't complain one time. He swept the floor so all the crumbs were gone in the kitchen, and then he picked up his Legos and superheroes and clothes from his and Josh's floor. He fixed his bed and Josh's, so it would look nice for when he came home to take a nap in it.

He hadn't thought about bad things in a whole day and that was a long time for him. Plus, Grace called and that meant she was still there and still wanted to come home and be his foster mom again. Sometimes he wondered if Grace and William would adopt him but usually not. He knew they were wanting to adopt Josh, 'cause they talked about it sometimes when all the kids were supposed to be asleep, or outside playing.

Carter really didn't want to move again. It made his stomach hurt just thinking about it, so he stopped. He went out to the living room and looked for more stuff to do. Pretty soon it was snack, and Carter wanted to eat his animal crackers, but he also kind of wanted to bring them with tonight.

He bit his lip. “Just take two,” Ari whispered, shoving another one in Carter's hand. “Eat one now, and put that one in your bag.”

Sharing contact was the only thing Carter and Ari ever did together. They didn't talk a lot and they didn't even like each other, but they helped each other with contact stuff and that was good. He needed somebody who knew what it was like and she needed somebody who was brave.

Sometimes she even held his hand on the way to try and calm down.

It usually never worked.

Carter hoped that today it would.

“Okay everybody, sit down at the table.”

Yes! Activity time! Carter hoped it was as fun as baking cookies.

It was. Because they made homemade play dough out of flour and water and food coloring and shiny things.

When Zoey freaked out about the red food coloring Carter offered to take it and use it far away from her. “Red's my favorite color,” he said to nobody.

“Red's like blood,” Zoey whined. She was still kind of shaking. Carter wouldn't tease her. It wasn't nice to tease when somebody was really for real afraid.

“Here, what color do you want?” Carter asked. “I'll see if we have it.”

“Yellow.”

“Carter, can I borrow this to make purple?” Harper asked.

“Yes, but give it back,” he said importantly, checking the cupboard for yellow dye. He found it and brought it to them.

“Liv, you hate Play Doh, why are you letting us make this,” Noah pointed out. He was making his green.

“This doesn't stink,” she said simply.

Carter looked around at everyone. Charlie was barely touching hers and didn't want anything to mess up her outfit.

Carter thought it looked dumb, but he didn't tell her. Grace taught him to say, “It's not my favorite,” if he didn't like clothes. It didn't hurt people's feelings as much as saying they're clothes looked dumb. But Charlie really did, though. She had tan pants like a working lady and a really fuzzy sweater that was all white. She was gonna spill on it. She always did, and then she threw a fit, because her outfit wasn't perfect. Or her hair wasn't done right.

Carter was glad his hair was really short and he didn't have to do anything to it.

Just then, Zoey's yellow squirted out all crazy and landed on Charlie's sleeve. She didn't even start screaming. She just left the table and started crying.

“It was an accident,” Zoey protested.

“I know, but lets put the yellow down anyway,” Emma encouraged.

Carter could tell Charlie was gonna freak out big time. He wanted to be far away when that happened. Like outside playing with Dudley, or up on the roof. He made a face. It was too cold to play outside and it was too dangerous on the roof. Maybe he'd just have to go to his room and turn on the noise machine to block her out.

So far, he didn't hear her yet and that was good. Carter checked out everybody's dough. Noah's looked like cool green and he was making a snake. Harper's purple was sparkly. Oliver was making black. Maybe he wanted to make a spider? Ari was doing blue and making a great design in hers. He didn't understand her art, but she said that's the point.

Carter put his eyes back on his own work. He had to make this shield perfect, for maximum protection.

After, they had leftover pizza and tacos for lunch. Carter didn't eat any tacos. Just pizza. Josh came home looking tired, and Carter knew it was time for his nap.

“I have to do my hair,” Charlie said, not eating any food. “I need you, Emma. You're my captain!”

“Okay, okay...” Emma laughed.

It didn't take long for Carter to hear Charlie yelling that Emma wasn't doing it right. That it wasn't the way her real mom did it. Carter rolled his eyes. The same thing happened when Grace or William or Harper or Ari tried to help. No one knew how to do it as good as Charlie's real mom, but Charlie's real mom wasn't there.

“My real mom's gonna be mad,” Charlie warned. “She likes me to look nice, not homely. That means my hair up and way from my face and nice clothes. For fancy.”

“A headband won't work?” Emma asked.

Carter waited for it.

“Are you kidding? A headband?” Carter heard Charlie say like Emma had suggested she put a snake in her hair or something.

“My best sweater already has a stain and my hair's gonna look stupid with a stupid headband in it!” Charlie exploded, crying. “Don't you know how to French braid or anything?”

“Charlie,” Olive called “Your hair's too fine for that.”

“No, it's not!” Charlie shrieked.

Carter covered his ears. He could see Ari doing it, too. And Zoey. The three of them didn't like the sounds of screaming. He went to his room and closed the doors, turning on the noise machine, but it didn't do anything.

The bathroom was right across the hall. Much too close for Carter to ignore.

He wished Josh were here. Then everything would be okay because all of them would be together.